Part 3 - Simple Chores
14 November 2015 | Singapore, Singapore
Step 1. You do an online search for DIY stores in Singapore. You find that there are 3 chains, all with names ending in –fix. You pick the one called Shelffix and you see that they have 10 stores scattered around the island.
Step 2. You randomly pick one, type the address into your satnav and off you go.
Step 3. Turns out that for a store called Shelffix they have a surprisingly limited selection of shelves, but hey-ho, they’ve got 2 that are approximately the size you were looking for so you grab them.
Step 4. Turns out they only have 2 brackets that go with that size shelf…
Step 5. You buy 1 shelf and 2 brackets.
Step 6. You go to your car, pull up that list with the 10 stores on your phone and pick another one from the list. Type in satnav and turns out the 2 stores are 37 km apart. Which is pretty special because that is about as far as you can drive without falling of the island! But it’s a hot day and the car has airco, a radio and the petrol is paid for, so off you go.
Step 7. You arrive at a mall that could very well have been the exact same one that you just left, if you hadn’t just driven 41 km (yes, that’s correct … I took a wrong turn somewhere…).
Step 8. You search your arse off, but can’t find a darn Shelffix anywhere in the mall. Just when you realize that you are in Tampines Central Mall and you had to be in Tampines Central Shopping Centre, (right next to it!!) it’s 3.30pm and if you’d like to be home before the girls get home, you’d better shoot.
Step 9. Next day you have another errant on Orchard Road so you pull up the list with 10 stores again and type in the address for a Shelffix on Orchard Road.
Step 10. The satnav takes you to Plaza Singapura… and that is NOT the mall you need. You’ve forgotten your phone at home, so you can’t check.
Step 11. Next day you check the address again, re program the satnav and FOR F SAKE, it takes you to Plaza Singapura AGAIN!!!
Step 11. It’s Sunday morning, the rest of your family is still asleep, your helper is off and since she is now been waiting a whole week for some God damn shelves, you pull up a map and soon find out that the mall you wanted is NO WHERE NEAR Plaza Singapura. You get in the car, shout ‘Screw YOU’ to the satnav, drive to mall all by yourself and find the Shelffix, no problem at all!! VICTORY AT LAST!!
Step 12. Turns out, though, that they have plenty of brackets, but no shelves…. SHOOT ME DEAD!!!!
Step 13. You buy 2 freaking brackets.
Step 14. 3 days later… Your helper has lost all hope of ever being able to put her books some where, but you need to prove her wrong if it’s the last thing you do, so you go back to the very first Shelffix.
Step 15. You buy a second shelve…. And what do you know? ALL DONE!! 15th time lucky!!
So who says starting a new life in an unknown country is a piece of cake?
Who does???
Yeah, I thought so… NOBODY!!
ps. You can replace the word 'Shelve' for any of the following:
> Knee pads for volleyball
> A water bottle that does not leak
> Riding pants that do not make you die of heat stroke
> Riding gloves that cost under S$ 100
> A decent Sauvignon Blanc under S$ 25
> Catsan, the only brand of cat litter that Charlie will poop in
> PVC piping for a PTA project that I put my hand up for (btw I need to learn to control that hand!! Maybe another blog post on that alone...)
> Coriander when you have just managed to purchase ALL other ingredients for a Mexican feast. And Yes, Chinese Parsley is practically the same, but...
> Chinese parsley, when you have just managed etc etc
> That one Indian meal kit, without MSG and without 10 other ingredients you could die from, that I am 99% sure of I bought in the that one grocery store in that one mall, and we actually ALL (all 4!!) liked so much, but now for the life of me I can not find again
> Deodorant that works for more then 2 hours without aluminum in it
>
Reageer op dit reisverslag
Je kunt nu ook Smileys gebruiken. Via de toolbar, toetsenbord of door eerst : te typen en dan een woord bijvoorbeeld :smiley